Daisy’s Story: Prejudice, professionalism, and PTSD

For decades, conversations about cannabis were exchanges of whispers and only really occurred behind closed doors because of prohibition. But now, medical cannabis is a legally available and accessible treatment option for many in the UK - and we don’t want these patients to feel as if they have to hide, or be secretive about their use of medication. We want to amplify these voices and bring patient experiences to the forefront.

To address some common misconceptions and help remove the stigma that still surrounds medical cannabis in the UK, we’ve decided to share some of our patients stories, so their voices can be heard.

This week, we spoke to Daisy, a 47-year-old Chief Social Worker and medical health and addiction specialist, about how she balances prejudice, professionalism, and PTSD as a Releaf medical cannabis patient in Milton Keynes.

Can you tell me about your diagnosed health conditions and how they affect your daily life?

I have a whole selection of diagnosed conditions, but I’m mainly prescribed medical cannabis because of my post-traumatic stress disorder. I also have a couple of physical conditions, including a balance disorder which affects the inner ear and causes me to experience things like vomiting and dizziness.

My trauma history is multi-generational, and it means I have to live a double life for all intents and purposes - on the one hand I’m a professional, but on the other I’m also somebody who has got lived experience, and walking that line is really, really difficult. I have been prescribed all sorts of stuff over the years, and it usually knocks you out or makes you not feel anything, but medical cannabis allows me to walk that line.

What was life like before you had access to cannabis?

Before trying cannabis, I was very anxious. I had a series of panic attacks every day and was very depressed. I would get motion sickness simply by getting out of bed in the morning because of the balance disorder, and I would be vomiting several times a day. It was miserable. Over the years, I’ve tried lots of medications and nothing really touched me. Medical cannabis does.

So how did you first come across cannabis medical cannabis?

Some of my friends and family are absolute advocates and allies - they've seen the real difference in me. They would probably give you testimonials to that effect, too! I mean, my business partner is a child protection social worker, and she will say out loud to me, “It makes you well-er!”

On the other hand, some friends can be judgemental, but I guess it's about being responsible and picking your battles. Social change is generational. You can't just be like: “Let's all do this”.

Are there any other challenges that you've faced on your journey with cannabis so far?

Certainly from wider society - without a doubt, the stigma is massive. When my work colleagues tried to report me, I got asked by someone who had known me for 10 years if I'd been intoxicated at work - that’s the automatic response.

For some people, medical cannabis makes all the difference - it means that you can function and actually just focus on your wellness and health, rather than the politics and social justice issues often associated with it.

Why did you decide to become a patient with Releaf?

Knowledge is power in my world. So, I researched - and I researched a LOT.

I had a look at various medical cannabis clinics and what they did, and I liked Releaf the best just in terms of what the clinic offers. They’ve got a patient platform that works when nobody else’s does - and I've worked in the NHS for donkeys’ years,  all their computer systems are broken - whereas the Releaf platform is really easy to use. The information is good, the communication is brilliant - especially when it comes to speaking to admin staff about stuff like getting my follow-up scripts. Plus, the doctor I saw was just lovely.

Then the Starer Kit came within a couple of days after I'd seen the doctor - it’s slick is what it is! The jar is really tactile, which I really like, as is the puck. With the vaporiser, I upgraded and got the next one up which is also good, and it’s got a really nice feel to it in your hand. I think the Starter Kit is actually a really nice touch - whether you're cannabis-naive or you've been a previous cannabis user.

Having a medical cannabis card makes me feel better - and that counts. I’m living a dual existence, between being a cannabis patient with all these conditions, and being a registered professional who works in mental health - it can be really challenging. What that box said to me was: this is alright. And having the card in my wallet makes me feel better. It validates the fact that I'm a patient, not an addict. For me, that is actually more important than the legality of it.

When you’ve spent all your life with people telling you that you have an unhealthy addiction, then you receive something nice like that in the post - it’s like someone’s come along and said, “Actually, you’re not a junkie”. To me, the box says: “This is medication. Here, have some nice things”. That appeals to me psychologically, after being in the closet for so many years. It's like you're saying to us that it's okay, and that’s what counts.

I appreciate that I’m in a privileged position in a lot of ways, that I can afford medical cannabis privately. But if someone can afford to go private, then I will definitely recommend they choose Releaf.

What about someone who is not sure about whether or not they should try medical cannabis?

We get so many drugs and pharmaceuticals thrown at us. I mean, at one point my doctor was giving me medication that meant that I literally dribbled. The medical system just seems to keep medicating and keep medicating when things don't work, and people don’t really understand what's going on in their heads. Cannabis means that I can live and function, in contrast to a lot of medications that I might get from my GP.

Within the drug services and Addiction Services, I can't tell you how many middle-aged women I saw at the beginning of my career who were hooked on Diazepam. If you’ve been addicted to, and stop taking, opiates or benzodiazepines, then you’ll probably feel really sick. Whereas if I stop taking cannabis, I just get a bit irritable.

Is there anything else we haven't spoken about already that you would love the world to know about your experience?

It would be that cannabis users can actually be productive members of society. I've got a 30 year career. I've published nine textbooks. I run my own business and have done so for nearly 15 years. I was an NHS executive director, the Mental Capacity Lead for the College of Social Work - and I am a medical cannabis user. And those two things work together. If anybody doubts that, just look at me.

What was life like before you had access to cannabis?

Before trying cannabis, I was very anxious. I had a series of panic attacks every day and was very depressed. I would get motion sickness simply by getting out of bed in the morning because of the balance disorder, and I would be vomiting several times a day. It was miserable. Over the years, I’ve tried lots of medications and nothing really touched me. Medical cannabis does.